Wait, that's not true at all. I'd never move to that godforsaken town or own a Macbook Pro. And more importantly, I hate most indie movies (but I love plenty of independent films). Most indie movies are cheap rewrites of The Ice Storm or The Squid & The Whale directed by weird hipsters who want to be Woody Allen but have to settle for Steve Zissou-era Wes Anderson. Some might call these affronts to the art of cinema a "guilty pleasure" (not the guy in the link), but these heathens are the same heathens that think Bon Iver is for something other than sleeping (thank you Justin Timberlake) or the Nissan Leaf is cooler than a '66 Mustang with a Fastback.
This is not say I dislike ALL modern indie movies. Winter's Bone and Little Miss Sunshine were really good and Sideways is pretty perfect, but even for the ones I respect and/or appreciate, there's a commonality I simply can't bare anymore. The posters. I don't know for certain who designs every indie movie poster, but my guess is it's one of these people:
(scientific classification: hipsterus badwigandmomssunglassesitium)
OR
any one of these three people (scientific classification: hipsterus AndyWarholicae williamsburghida)
Now, fair reader, the main genus of indie movie poster has many sub-classifications, but for the most part there is a common theme. The main genus uses bright, primary colors almost blinding to normal human eyes (because they're not perpetually closed or wearing sunglasses) or natural scenery and a quirky font to accentuate the presence of an even quirkier looking person, couple, or group of people. It doesn't matter what the content of the movie is; whether it's a sad drama or a geek chic romantic comedy/adult-oriented dramady about a dysfunctional family (it's going to be one of these genres with something about the environment and Internet sprinkled throughout it), it will follow this basic schematic. The general template for this type of indie movie poster looks something like this:
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Here are a few examples of indie movies that employ this type of "adorkable" poster:
With Sundance and Berlinale having just finished up and Tribeca on the way in April, just remember to be wary of these posters, folks. The movie could be as funny and moving as Juno, as badass and intelligent as Primer, or it could be another From Justin to Kelly (in which case, set the reel on fire and hope no others will have to see it again). These aren't the days of the Jarmusch, Soderbergh, Tarantino, and Coen Brothers indie flicks anymore, people. It's a sad, strange world out there.
Keep your eyes out for upcoming indie movies with posters following this type and tweet them to me if you find them! Follow me at: @DylanMerrick6
~Viva amigos,
~D. Merrick
~Viva amigos,
~D. Merrick
